It's been nearly a year... what has he been doing? Where has he been? What has he been eating? Is he dead? Is he more powerful then ever? That is for him to foresee... and for you to find out.

Are you sitting down?

You should probably sit down.

After nine months and 17 days.... thIs... Is... thE bEYOnDeR!!!

It occured to the Beyonder today that he had not checked in with his secretery for a while... almost a year, in fact. So he created a paper cup with a string going to another paper cup.

Beyonder: GRACE!!!!
(silence)
GRACE!!!!
(silence)
GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA--
Grace: ALRIGHT!
Beyonder: Excellent, you're there.
Grace: Who...? Dexter?
Beyonder: Correct! Do I have calls?
Grace: I thought you were dead! Where have you been?
Beyonder: Well I've... ... ... I... I don't know.
Grace: You don't know.
Beyonder: No, I... it's as if... the past nine months and 17 days is a complete blur. (WHOOO-HOOO song 2)
Grace: You... are such... a gypsy.
Beyonder: I don't see how--
Grace: GYPSY LEPRECHAUN!
Beyonder: oh. If you say so.... Do I have any calls?
Grace: Thousands. I'll forward them to your office computer.
Beyonder: Oh right, my computer. (Quickly conjurs up a computer.)
Grace: Give it about an hour and they should arrive.
Beyonder: Thanks, Grace. I appreciate it.
Grace: (sigh) Sure.
Beyonder: Ok, well that's all. I'll be in touch.
Grace: Sure thing, Dex.
Beyonder: Ok, I'll see ya.
Grace: Dexter?
Beyonder: Grace?
Grace: ... It's nice to have you back.
Beyonder: Thanks, Grace. It's nice to talk to you again, too. Bye
Grace: Bye

AND THEN THE CUP EXPLODED!!!!

So the Beyonder had an hour to kill before his calls came through, so he figured he'd visit his old friends. He went to Matunuck, because's it's September and that's where everyone should be. To his shock and amazement, however, Matunuck was not there! Instead, a huge crater where the appartments used to be. The only remnants he could find was a bent up liscence plate with the letters ROXNNE. Wonder what happened.

After that, he went to Georgia's house to make sure she was still alive and well. Indeed she was. She was pirating music of the intraweb. The Beyonder went inside quietly and shouted SURPRISE!!!!! He thought she would be happy to see him.

Beyonder: Hallo, Georgia, it's been a long time!! What happened to Matunuck?
Georgia: Maybe I am, and maybe I am!
Beyonder: Georgia... that doesn't make any sense.
Georgia: Maybe you should cry about it!
Beyonder: You must be being taken over by intraweb pirates. Don't worry I'll save you.

The Beyonder then proceded to unhook Georgia's computer from the intraweb.

Georgia: DUDE! NOT EVEN! I WAS LIKE 86% DONE WITH AH-HA TAKE ON ME! AND 43% DONE WITH THE ELECTRIC SLIDE!
Beyonder: Yes, well, now we can have a real conversation!! I'm so happy I'm going to do a dance!

He then fell to the ground and began rolling back and forth, this being the traditional happy dance of the Beyonder people. Suddenly, though, Georgia gave a mighty kick and the Beyonder flew towards the door. Unfortunately, he got stuck in the door, but Georgia employed her push broom to release him and then slammed the door to his back.

It's been a long time. It's good to know that Georgia is still bat shit crazy. AND HE KILLED AN HOUR!!!

Back at the extra-dimensional plane, the Beyonder began looking at the thousands of messages he had cued up. Not knowing really how to use a computer for such a thing, he hit the key marked DEL figuring that the good people at Del computers would offer some helpful tech support. That or he'd get some Del's Lemonade. Either way. Then all the messages disappeared. Del must have figured none of the messages were particularly important.

So the Beyonder willed a Del's for himself, and sat, content at how not much changes in nine months and 17 days, wondering what the future held for him. And then, because he thought about it, he knew what the future held for him. But he's not going to say... you're going to have to wait and find out.

pEAcE OUt!!